Public speaking-How to make it effective

A simple thing that I have noticed which becomes extremely difficult for many of us is public speaking. Often we have a lot of ideas, creativity but when it comes to express it in front of an audience, especially people we are seeing for the first time, is indeed a difficulty. I was no different, in my early days I had hardly done any public speaking and I could feel my legs tremble, my voice break, my eyes loosing focus and all whenever I was supposed to enter a stage or asked for addressing a group of people.

I would like to share a few tips that I used and found extremely useful when it comes to public speaking that helped me a lot that now I feel confident enough to handle an audience much better.

1) The first and foremost thing we need during public speaking is confidence in oneself. Make sure you have the talent and tell the same to yourself. Your mind should be calm, of curse this comes with practise and a few tries, and focused and let the confidence flow in. You are not the worst public speaker around and you are one of the best future speakers, keep this in mind.

2)Always consider your audience and what they know about the subject you are talking about; generally we get a mixed audience those who don't know the topic, those who know a bit and those who have a greater knowledge on the topic. Make sure your speech/talks are simple so that all these groups can be attracted. Once you gain the audience attention, you are half won.

3)Never say anything that you are not confident about or cannot justify. This way you can handle questions from the audience in a better way.If you are doubtful you can always get back to them later or say that in my opinion/I beleive this is like this. Nobody is perfect so to admit things like this will just improve your skills rather than saying foolish things in public.

4)Never touch controversial topics, its better that we always do a practice as of what we want to speak. Make small notes, practice in front of the mirror/ a friend and ensure that you know what you are about to speak once you are on stage.

5)Voice control is a major attribute in public speaking. Ensure you are audible and your voice is clear. No need to shout (especially if mike is there) but maintain the right emotions in your voice; you can record few rehearsal speeches and improve by listening to that.

6)Make sure your body language is appropriate, leaning on a table, pressing palms together etc shows nervousness, so avoid them. Move your hands gently as per your speech if needed, and you can also walk slowly if you want as it eases the tension a lot.

7)Never bore your audience. Keep your speaking interactive, if you feel the audience is no longer interested, wind up the speech.

8)Every person has weaknesses, this can be overcome by practise only; on the meantime rely on your strengths and empower them.

9)Make sure you analyse the topic thoroughly before making a speech, you should be confident enough to deal with questions asked on the topic.

10)Do not read from notes during speech, I give this a big NO NO as you are wasting eye contact with your audience, which is the major step in public speaking. Small notes on rleavant points can be kept just as a reference if you forget something, but make sure you dont need it anyway.

11)Respond, adjust and adapt. Respond to the questions from the audience, give them importance and ensure that you answer the question completely. Adjust to the situation while you are on s stage (as per the level of audience, their numbers etc:) and also adapt to the situatons (may be you have to reduce your speech due to unforseen circumstances)

30 steps for writing effective emails (personal or corporate)

Today we live in a technologically revolutionised environment and words like facebook or email are common to the ordinary man. It's been long since we have seen letters coming via post boxes but the use of emails have increased day by day and we more or less communicate serious matters over mails, not chats, as they provide later as a proof of communication too.

Now my question is are there any rules for emails, you may get loads by searching in google or so, but what I feel are the below simple rules can help you write a better email, try this and find the dufference for yourself.

1) Always use an active voice in your mails (Eg: My plane is coming at 5:30 PM in New York and I will reach the meeting by 8PM). This shows your assurance and the reader can be sure about your plan/intentions rather than guessing this is what the sender thought (this can be pretty dangerous).

2) Always make sure you address the person by his/her name, first name in full for official emails, pet names if any in personal mails is fine, but simply avoid this in official mails. This is because the same mail may be needed by someone else and can be forwarded to others and using pet names is not considered a standard practice. If you are sending to a group of people use "Hi Team, Hi All' to address them. Ensure that you do not include pet names or jokes if you are sending to a person the first time as he/she can take it in a wrong sense and the same applies while sending to a group (especially if subject of mail is something serious).

3) Keep your mail clear and concise. By clear I mean the message that you plan to deliver should reach the reader without confusing them. (Eg:"It's pretty cold here and blockages in the road can block me on the way to office and my reaching on time can be a big blockage" kind of things are simply confusing). Keep your mail short, try to deliver as much as you want and detailed explanations are not needed (unless asked to).

4) Avoid too many smileys (they do not look good in corporate world) and avoid such strange symbols like ! (exclamation mark). Some people have a habit of adding them to each and every situation and this looks odd  (Eg: I heard you are writing the exam. All the best!!!!...This sounds like the person is really wondering you have any luck at all for passing the exam). The thumb rule here is if unsure dont use any smileys or exclamations.

5)Avoid negative sentences in emails but better phrase them well with reason (Eg: Who the hell are you to say this can be started can sound negative and harsh. On the contrary "I beleive we need further communications/approvals to start the same" can deliver the message more positively).

6) Avoid contradicting statements or unintentionally problematic statements in emails (Eg: James did not finish thw work and is lazy. As I am on a tour, James will attend this meeting on behalf of me)

7) Use a constant font (a generalised Cambria font 11 or Times New Roman will do) throughout the mail. As your mail is concise, no need to keep some portion bold, highlighted in red or so (unless asked to) as each and every part of your email is important and must be read. People have a general habit to just check the bold or highlighted part and by this way some other meaning conveyed in normal font may be missed.

8) Use a standard signature in all official mails (avoid Yours lovingly kind of stuff here as its an email). The signature should contailn the email id to conatct you and a cell/phone number that can be used to reach you.

9)Make sure you send emails to only people who are concerned with the matter. Avoid sending to a distribution list unless necessary.

10)Avoid making a lot of paragraphs (2 paragraphs is enough in a mail) as we are writing an email, not an essay, it should be concise.People hate reading long mails.

11) Avoid short forms in emails unless you are sure the other person is aware of that term ( Eg: I will be in PTO till 24th of May, so expect a delay in responses. People in western countries get a Paid Time Off or PTO and in some cultures it's not present so make sure you understand to who you are sending)

12) Avoid BCC (hiding recepients) if possible in emails. If it involves a lot of people and the recepient needs to give a reply, he may not know who all to reply. In simple emails, this is fine, but better avoid it, unless necessary.

13) Try to avoid degrading, threatening, racist or immoral messages in emails even do not forward such emails, this can cause troubles which are far beyond your control.

14) Try to keep a meaningful subject line (never leave it blank) for your email, this always helps.

15)Proof read your email (read again after writing, spell check, grammer check) before clicking send button. Once send there is no way you can change what you have sent. (recall may not work everytime). If in doubt, call a trusted friend/colleague to proof read your email (avoid disclosing confidential matters to others)

16) In official emails if you are writing to an unknown person, make clear who you are in the email (in signature also this can be done) and on what purpose and on whose direction (if needed) you are contacting that person. This will avoid delays and confusions. Everyone are busy so in initial communication if we cover these things, further communications will go smooth.

17) Do not assume the mentality of the reader. Keep messages gender free and no need to drag in controversial opinions or discussions where it is unnecessary, stay neutral.

18) Avoid excessive compliments or flattery as people may think this as a way of buttering/you want something from them. Make genuine statements of compliments if needed.

19) Emails are not a place to show you are William Shakespeare (Eg: With the profound intellectuality of recent events, we can merchandise the things equivalently). Keep your emails clear and simple, use simple English that everyone understands.

20) Avoid excessive questions in one mail (one question one mail is the maximum as more questions can confuse readers). Make sure you state the benefits (if any) from the email or its action items.

21) Avoid writing in capital letters (and bold unless strictly needed). This gives a screaming feeling to the reader and in some cultures it's considered insulting.

22) Avoid unnecessary attachments. If a person asks you a Word document, just attach and send that, no need to send five or six supporting documents you used to prepare that word document.

23) Avoid the "Reply All" and "Forward" button for every mail you receive. This helps you to effectively communicate and avoid server congestions.

24)Avoid highly confidential matters in emails if possible, as security is always an issue.

25) Avoid using unnecessary phrases like (URGENT, EMERGENCY etc). The reciever may get around 100 mails per day so you can't judge what's important for you is important for the reader. Everyone considers their emails as important.

26) Avoid replying to spam mails (if official mail, report them) or disclose your ID to unknown people.

27) Use visual aids (a screenshot or so) if needed as it helps the reader understand your concern better.

28) Try to avoid assuming things, you may know something (may be a technical term) of which the reader is unaware of, keep yourself in the readers show while composing any mail.This knowledge gap can waste much time if not handled properly.

29)If you are sending to people in other time zones, delays are possible , especially on Monday mornings (after weekend many mails are there). So choose a suitable time to send your mail (or expect a reply)

30) Always reply the genuine mails you receive, show acknowledgement and appreciate (dont over do it) the other persons time and effort.

Tarot card rules I follow and want to be followed

Today I thought of writing about the general rules of tarot cards reading that I follow and I wish to follow when in a tarot session, before or after. The first and foremost rule is the compatibility between the tarot reader and the client, go to a tarot reader only if you are confident in that person and above all you are not going there to experiment the knowledge of the person reading the tarot, but to find generalised ideas on how you can improve situations in your life, owing to the tarot cards read. Now let's see some of the general rules that I beleive in

Rules for the clients:
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1) Please treat the tarot as a means of divination, nobody can tell you exactly what your future is and never ask a tarot reader to exactly predict your future as it is in your hands as well as depends on various other factors. The tarot reader can help you with suggestions to improve the result or clarify doubts.

2)Never mistrust/mistreat a tarot reader as he/she is trying to help you. Go only to a genuine person who knows how to read tarots and never indulge in tarot sessions with persons you dont beleive, it will not be of any help for the tarot reader nor the client.

3)Keep yourself calm and present during the tarot session. You need to pay attention to what the tarot reader says and think clearly on how the same can be applicable in your life. Don't rush yourselves and be focused during the reading session and co-operate with the reader so that the session is fruitful for both parties.

4)Avoid using drinks containing caffeine or such emulating drinks/food that can get you over excited.The client should be in a balanced state of mind and often a too excited mind doesnt find reason but jump in to action based on whatever they hear.Avoiding such things will make your mind calm and free and you will be able to clearly ask your questions.

5)Try to have a personal chat with the tarot reader (oh, I love this part as it brings a connection between the tarot reader and the client.) This will avoid any misconceptions or assumptions you have and both parties will feel confient in each others company so that the tarot reading session will be effective.

6) Sit in a posture that comforts you, if you want less light/more light ask for it. Being comfortable lets your mind and body relax (not to sleep of course) and this will let you concentrate on the readings, the more comfortable you are, the better the session goes. After all, client satisfaction is the key secret in anything.


Rules for the tarot reader:
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1) The thumb rule for any tarot reader is customer satisfaction, the client come there for a better advice in tyring situations, keep the advices simple, clear and concise. Don't tell this/that will definitely happen as divination is all about changes, advice them on possible outcomes based on the cards.

2) Make yourself familiar with the tarot deck you use (for example I use the Thoth tarot deck). Make sure that you recognise any card within 2 seconds by just seeing it. You can give a two word phrase for each card that shows the properties of the card and remember them. The more quick you are with this, the better you can read the tarot.

3) Never ever judge a day/problem for the client based on a sinle card. This will be like trying to put all your daily needed stuff in a small sack, which cannot contain everything. I would better suggest go for a 3 card reading. A single card often never reveals all aspect of a problem or a day. When you have gained enough experience, you can go for advanced card readings (more cards at a time).

4)The positive/negative effect of a card always depends on other cards drawn along with it for the client. Never predict/advice anything unless you thoroughly check all the cards drawn by the client. Sometimes negative cards often show an end of a bad thing in life and something good is on the way which the other cards reveal, so judge them together and never independently.

5) Make sure you go through the cards on a regular basis. Many people feel they are acquainted enough with cards but sometimes the card combinations can be too tough to read especially if very positive and very negatve things come along. Look for the common traits here and as everyone says, only with experience one becomes perfect. By repeatedly reading tarot cards, you will be confident enough on any card combinations.

6)If the client is directly present in front of you, you can allow them shuffle the cards, deal and take the cards. This will bring them in to more connection with the cards and they wont feel the tarot reader is doing any manipulation.Often clients are curious and happy by doing this, of course it wont work if you are doing a reading over phone, but I personally ike to do direct readings.

7) Be genuine with your clients. I always talk to them in private and dont like to do readings of a person in a group. There will be many personal things which the client won't feel confident to speak when in public, so if possible (I make it sure that I do this way) do it alone with your client. Ensure that whatever communication is made between you and your client is strictly confidential. Never ever reveal the things told by your client to anyone, which is a part of ethics and your credibility.


Hope these rules help you in tarot reading/listening sessions. Have a great day...

Practice makes perfect

Once there lived a young prince named Sam who was the only child of the king of a very rich and influential country. He had taken special training in archery and in his training showdown proved that he was the best archer in the whole country and a worthy heir for the kingdom. The King was very happy about the skills of his son and appointed a special minister to assist the prince with royal matters as Sam would be the future king of the nation.

Sam was very arrogant due to the thought that he had mastered whatever possible in archery and he had no rival competent enough in the whole world. He became interested in the worldly pleasures that was there in the palace and spend time in entertaining activities and showed least interest in royal matters.The minister was very much worried about the same and decided to talk to the price. When the minister went to the palace. the prince was drawing a picture and the prince was happy to see the minister looking at his painting.

Sam:"What do you think Minister, apart from archery, am too good with the paint brush, isn't it?"

The minister smiled and nodded. He said:" The prince indeed has a lot of talent, the arts and culture needs to be flourished but as a prince you should be ready to take part in royal discussions and daily archery practice.This will help you to understand the politics involved and rule this mighty kingdom."

The prince didnt like the ministers idea that he had to train archery daily.

Sam:"I am very good in archery already Minister. Let me master the rest of things now, I will study the royal things as time pass by."

The minister left sadly. Years passed, and the prince didnt practice archery but allowed himself to be indulged in pleasures the palace offered. Suddenly one day the king got terribly ill and died. Sam was made the new king and he was not sure what to do next as being the King, he understood that the King has many responsibilities. As the King died, a cruel conqueror decided to attack this mighty kingdom. Sam let his troops in to the battle, but to his great surprise he found that he had lost his touch in archery skills and he was not able to focus his arrows which led him to a big despair. Sam was arrested and his army was on the verge of defeat when the minister, who asked aid of a neighbouring country, with its army fought against the conqueror and succeeded. The conqueror fled and Sam was very ashamed that he didnt listen to the minister initially.

After returning to throne, Sam appointed the minister as his cheif advisor and started practising archery and studying politics by which he became one of the most famous kings that land had ever seen.